I'm waving the white flag....
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| I surrender..... |
What a difference a handful of days makes!
As you've probably deduced from my past post's I've REALLY struggled with the whole idea of competing as a Fitness Model.
I've struggled with many elements but mostly with the fact that I'd be walking on stage looking fitter than I've ever looked YET be the least fit I've ever been.
I've decided that my training needs to have a greater purpose than just looking good.
The thing that brought this to head was a meeting with my trainer Monday morning.
He had been to a competition to do a recon for us and his firm thinking was that I was too light to compete in September and realistically I'd be looking at May next year.
He basically said I need to be around 10kg heavier than I am now, stripped of bodyfat.
Ummm....just no.
Taekwondo is my main focus and I have no desire to put an extra 10kg of muscle on this body, I'm fast and light and that's what makes me a good Taekwondo athlete and I'm not willing to sacrifice that.
The other thing is I'm pulling up super sore and that alone isn't a new thing but what keeps coming into my mind is....sore for what?? To look good when your fitness is deteriorating and your TKD is suffering? I'm happy to be sore, this is part of daily life, but the purpose needs to be higher than just looking good.
I've also found I just really, really miss my style of training.
Here is an example of the program I'm on for Fitness Model Prep on a Monday:
Lying Hamstring Curl
Stiff Leg Deadlift
Leg Press
Seated Hamstring Curl
Step-ups
All super heavy and 5 sets: 12,10,8,8,8
The range of moment is shortened on most exercise to about a 3rd so we are hitting the belly of the hamstrings.
No function in this, it's all about how the muscle looks.
No cardio.
Here is an example of my Rip It Up Challenge Monday workout (release 3 - not released yet)
Barbell Hang Clean Press 4 x 20DB Shoulder Press / Upright Row / Diagnal Raise 4 x 15 in a circuit
Plyo Circuit: 10 reps of each x 10 setsBox JumpsSide to Side on StepUp & Overs
DB Diagnal Squat Press 4 x 10 each side
DB Delt Raise / Front Raise / Rear Raise 4 x 15 in a circuit
Plyo Circuit: 10 reps of each x 10 setsJump Step-UpsMountain ClimbersJump Squats
I'd also add a HIIT sesh, endurance ride or kicking session in the PM.
Now THAT'S training.
Once you train in this way it is very hard to go back.
I woke up this morning and the first thing I did was head to the file that held this program and the minute I saw it I got excited about training....it seems this is my thing.
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| Plenty of Carbs :-) |
The last time I did this program was when I was prepping to head to a Martial Arts Convention in Las Vegas.
We (Wendy) were so fit and I was really happy with how lean I was and how much muscle I had on my frame.
The pic on the left was taken in Vegas at dinner with Wendy. My shoulders and arms look great and this was achieved through high rep and lower weights. I remained injury free and loved every second of training.
Lean tummy, developed obliques and reasonable abs although we didn't do any specific ab work.
I could be leaner in the abs but I'd not long met Dave and we ate out A LOT and enjoyed many dinners and wine at home over the weeks prior so I wasn't as lean as I could have been had I not partook quite so much :-)
But really the training mostly took care of the excess cals.
Aside from my competition days (taekwondo) I'd never felt so fit and fast and strong and I absolutely loved this training.
This is where my heart is and so this is where I'm going to be spending my training time.
As soon as I started training outside of my core beliefs around training things started to unravel.
My mood changed in a big way, I'm usually chatty, upbeat and positive. A regular dose of sunshine :-)
It almost felt like some sort of low level depression.
I could do the training no problem.
I could eat as prescribed no problem.
But my brain was screaming at me everyday...it was screaming WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING????? ARE YOU CRAZY????
The minute I decided to let this go, printed out Release 3 and made the decision to do that I felt like me again.
The balance is restored and I'm training within my integrity once again.
Seriously why I have to learn things the hard way is anyones guess but I'm really glad I took that short detour to help remind me of how deeply ingrained and how valued my training principles and philosophies are.
I'm no quitter and I don't expect you to quit either...but.....are you training outside of what you really believe in?
Are you doing something because you think you should? Because you think you need to tick that box?
If the other stuff in your life is not going to plan take some time to think about if or how your training is having an impact.
There's a difference between quitting because things got too hard and making the best decision for you based on your core principles and beliefs around training.
If you're following a plan that makes no sense to you then it's ok to abandon it and find something better or modify the one you have so it fits within your training integrity.
This apply's to your nutrition as well.
Anyway a bit of a ramble in the end but I hope it serves those of you in a similar struggle :-)
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