A MASSIVE week of reflection...

Yeah Baby!

Strap yourself....this could be a looooong one!

This week has been really big.....

Over the past few months I've struggled to be honest...my child's illness seriously knocked me for six...it's always in the back of my mind and it seemed every time I'd start to see the light at the end of the tunnel things were thrown backwards in a big way.

At times I've had moments where I've thought..ok, this is it...I can stop worrying and start focusing on where I'm headed....and then something would happen to send things backwards.

I won't lie...it's been tough....much tougher than I ever expected, made tougher by the seeming lack of progress.

I've been riding the ups and downs like a rollercoaster....completely ungrounded and that's never a good thing for me.

Lack of grounding means I'm unfocused and unproductive...everything I do MUST have meaning and come from a place of deep and complete authenticity and connection to the idea or I find myself spinning my wheels...and that's what I've been doing in my business life.

I've thrown myself into my training because training is very grounding and Martial Arts training is especially so.

It's no co-incidence that throwing myself 100% into my Martial Arts training has seen me feeling much more grounded and focused and has freed up my creative side once again allowing ideas to flow in a big way!

When I'm feeling ungrounded I do an audit on my life.....I ask myself "what's out of sync with my deepest principles and beliefs and where am I living outside of my integrity?".

For me these things don't need to be big, in fact it's often a multitude of small things building up that bring things to a head.

I needed to make some small changes to get myself back into a state of flow. Flow is when the path I am on is clear and things are unfolding naturally along the way.

Since making a few small changes I'm already back in that place and I'm feeling grounded, focused and determined once again...I'm once again a woman on a mission, the best version of myself :-)

So this week has thrown up a few revelations....

When I'm feeling the way I have been I tend to default to seeking distraction..hence the Fitness Model (BAD) idea.
This was an awesome way for me to be distracted by stepping right outside my integrity and fight a daily internal battle, I knew this would occur but forced it anyway, thankfully I came to my senses quickly enough.

I also tend to think I need someone to kick my ass ie: get coaching, sign up for a new program...you know...that sort of thing.

But the thing is I don't NEED anything or anyone to help me get where I'm going.

I know all the stuff I need to know and I have everything I need to make it happen including some kickass fellow entrepreneurs who are on the same path I am.

I don't need accountability, I'm one of the most disciplined people I know, what I needed was connection to my idea.

What I mean by this is often a great idea reveals itself and I sink a bazillion percent time, effort and energy into it and burn myself out and then don't want to look at it again for AGES.
But what happens is I forget the magic of the idea, unless I work in it everyday and remain close to the idea I simply forget how awesome it is and I treat it as such.

So I've changed things up so this thing is the first thing I work on each day, I immerse myself in it fully and this is where I feel connection to the idea and where momentum stems from.

I've had to work hard to keep the balance so that I DON'T spend 10hrs a day on this thing forgetting to eat, ditching my training sessions and letting the washing pile up.

I do love working like that but it takes its toll.

I've discovered that I've had this unconscious but negative belief around success and that is SUCCESS = DRIVING MYSELF INTO THE GROUND OR NOTHING AT ALL.

What I know is the that the times of my greatest success have all come from the times I've been in flow and success came easily...this is actually the truth...I've had this unconscious internal battle going on for god knows how long and it needed to be dealt with.

Another thing I noticed was the stress and unhappiness I was carrying in my body....I observed that even when I was happy and stress free I could still feel it in my body, my body was hanging on to the past stresses and unhappiness left over from my daughters illness.

Kinesiology is a great way to handle this so I had a session to help rid this stuff from the cells of my body.

I found I was in the habit of spending time with people who didn't fit in my world right now...great people who will remain in my life but for now I need my space.

Taking the time to have this space has also helped to open up the flow and allow me to connect deeply with myself.

I really feel as though a major shift has taken place this week and it's already having an impact.

Doors are opening on some pretty fantastic opportunities and I'm once again enjoying my life and appreciating everything I have in it.

It is an awesome place to be and I'm really excited about what the rest of the year holds.

I've let go of the fact that the year has been ticking away and I constantly felt behind...I'm a big believer in timing and now I clearly see I'm exactly where I need to be and that if I had launched my online program sooner I would have completely missed the opportunity to take things in the direction they are now taking... a direction that is so exciting and fulfilling there are barely words...

The universe has been playing a role in this too....my website delays have been frustrating but now I have an even clearer vision this has turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

You know what....THAT felt like a therapy session :-)

Deep reflection is cathartic and really does free you up to move forwards....highly recommend it!

Have an awesome weekend guys.

Michelle xx